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My number one question is about family - I want him to be able to be around for kids when that time comesso how realistic is it to expect him to be there for their sporting games or whatever they're doing. All this said, God is love and fully understands and appreciates your problem. I can see why people get a divorce when their kids get older. And on the other hand the thought of having to go through these residency years ahead haunts me. How will your spouse feel about that in 20 years. Posts from people who have your same problem occur on a regular basis here on RFM. Accept yourself, and feel God accepting you, and everything else will follow.
I told her that is noble but she would be selfish to marry and work 80 hour work weeks yet if she does marry I can not see any man who would selflessly give over decades for the sake of his wife's career. After skimming a lot of these comments it seems like many people have found that the most effective way of coping with their relationship with a doctor is to have low expectations or acknowledge that they will always be second. It was more about my own spirituality and our relationship in our marriage. I often feel it's harder than being a single mom because the false hope is just torture.