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Podcast: Download The number one answer that everyone says is go back in time and kill baby Hitler. I would however redirect the atrocity towards a more deserving crowd. What the fuck kind of principle is this to be proud of!? Who gives a shit!?
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This story was produced in partnership with Epic Magazine. I got my first pubic hair when I was 2 years old. Or so they tell me. I have no recollection of a time before puberty, before the carnal cravings, the impulses, the angst and anger and violence. There was no prelapsarian age of innocence for me; I was born, I took a huge bite of the apple, and, by 2 years old, I was pretty much ready to get busy with Eve. It was the same for my father, and for his father, and for his father, and for the men in my family going back as far as we have records. In women of reproductive age, the LHCGR triggers ovulation; in men, it triggers testosterone production.